Help Ms Mostly! My Daughter Borrowed Money From Me …

Borrowed At Forty Five
Dear Ms Mostly

Dear Ms Mostly,

I am thinking about doing something about the money my daughter borrowed from me and I can’t sleep!  I gave my daughter (and her husband) sixty thousand dollars for a down payment on a house. Then they borrowed a further fifteen thousand so they could clear off some debt and start a business.

That was four years ago and I haven’t seen a cent. They seem to be doing fine and just bought a new vehicle.  They live a block from me and haven’t spoken to me for a year, since the last time I brought up the debt.

I am thinking of filing a suit against them.



It was generous of you to give your daughter money for their house. With regards to the “Loan”; If the money is asked for and given, with no payment terms laid out on the onset, it is a “Give”. Especially if you add into the equation that you have no payment schedule in a written contract, your daughter has not made any payments and a reasonable amount of time has past.

At this point, it is best to take a much-needed step back. Know that starting any legal action will not get your money back because you have no payment plan to indicate that it’s a loan. All this will serve to do is to guarantee a permanent and unrepairable break in your relationship. Walk over to their house and ask the simple question, “Short of giving you more money, what can I do to repair our relationship?”

At this point, you need to decide which is more important, your relationship with your daughter or getting your money back.


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