Finally, the tides have turned Dear Sisters. Women have endured sexual discrimination, harassment, assault, and abuse for millennia. Time is up. Now, with just a word, a woman can destroy a man; his reputation, his relationship with his children, his career, his life. The power is ours. What will we do with it?
The Time’s Up Legal Defense Fund provides subsidized legal support to those who have experienced sexual harassment in the workplace. It was started by Hollywood celebrities who realized the power of their voices in response to producer Harvey Weinstein’s sexual misconduct, but it has been extended to other industries as well. It focuses on blackmail or promises of extra hours and pay or movie roles by supervisors for sex. The fund is housed by the National Women’s Law Center.
Timesupnow.com states, “Dear Sisters… This imbalance of power fosters an environment that is ripe for abuse and harassment against women.”
The reverse is also true now, as the balance of power shifts.
“Beware that, when fighting monsters, you yourself do not become a monster… for when you gaze long into the abyss. The abyss gazes also into you.”― Friedrich Nietzsche
To maintain equality, women must not abuse the power of their newfound strength and voice. Every woman who lies about harassment or abuse ruins our validity and momentum. Every woman who holds anger and vengeance against a man and retaliates with blackmail for extra hours and pay and roles (or even sex), destroys our mission of respect with hypocrisy.
I’ve witnessed this sabotage of good, honorable men myself. Why?
To hide the fact that she willingly cheated on her boyfriend, she accused her lover of rape.
To get an A in English, she accused an innocent teacher of pedophilia.
To get the attention she desperately craves.
To justify her abuse of him.
To get custody of the children and accompanying child support.
A dear male friend of mine has been raped by a woman, fondled at work, and blackmailed for sex.
This is not actually a one-sided issue of men abusing their power over women. In fact, lots of people are not aware that the Time’s Up gofundme campaign included men as victims.
I’m aware my view may not be popular with militant feminists who combat the patriarchy with adopted masculine tactics, those who fight fire with fire.
I prefer the Divine Feminine vision of mutual love and respect.
Rarely are there witnesses to secret offers of advancement or groping. A single victim knows nothing will be done, but multiple voices sisters, in unison against a person abusing power carries significant weight. Speaking out against an abusive director or boss publicly as a group is a great idea, even when courts and juries won’t listen, perhaps the offensive supervisor in charge will find a lack of employees who can get the job done. It takes bravery and ingenuity to refuse a job, to risk your home, or your dreams. I personally refuse to prostitute myself.
Whether Dominique Strauss-Kahn is or is not a philanderer in France, did or did not have sex with a hotel maid, was or was not set up by political rivals, the fact is that the maid lied. She admitted it, and still got 1.5 million dollars. She ruined his career and damaged the word of women everywhere.
Maybe Strauss-Kahn’s behavior was inappropriate, but it does not justify lying.
I cannot just blindly say, “I believe you.”
Anger that Brock Turner got off so easily for sexually assaulting an intoxicated and unconscious woman behind a dumpster because he’s a good swimmer should not extend to all men. They are not all Brock.
This makes logical sense but I’ve still heard things from women who hate men in general and then complain about misogyny. They ignore the kind, honest, loving men in the world who embody the “feminine” qualities we desire in our leaders. They don’t even recognize them.
This essay is for those women, as well as the women who have made Time’s Up Campaign a feminist tool.
Let’s take our power by creating our own companies, film productions, and financing for female-owned businesses and treat men with the same respect we deserve. Let’s show them how it’s done… with integrity, Dear Sisters.